Rapper & NBA Star Prove Earth is Flat

flat earth

A famous rapper and NBA star today proved that the Earth is, in fact, flat. In August the DNA evidence linked OJ to the murders. Is there a link? What are we missing? Perhaps textbooks should be rewritten. Rich white Republicans should riot. No, wait. DNA science is bogus. And the Earth IS flat. Or not. Someone call Alex Jones and ask him. Alex thinks 9/11 was a government conspiracy. Wasn’t Bush President at the time? Okay, maybe not. Let’s ask BoB, the rapper who dissed Neil deGrasse Tyson, although Neil has a doctorate in astrophysics from Columbia after earning degrees in physics and astronomy from Harvard and the University of Texas…while B.o.B. dropped out of the ninth grade. Does that matter? Actually, on Youboob, NOT being educated is MORE impressive. Only number of hits and followers counts. So let us repeat: THE EARTH IS FLAT, FOLKS. NASA LIES ABOUT, LIKE, EVERYTHIN. YOU CAN TAKE THAT TO DUH F$#&ING BANK!   

In other McNews, due to the overwhelming resistance to science by those sporting automatic weapons, the scheduled Science March on Washington on Earth Day has been cancelled. (Or canceled, for those few who follow science news in America.) We now return you to the Cricket World Cup, sponsored by Cricket Wireless, whose slogan is “Something to Smile About.”

fake news media

App Store Features Terrorism POV Game

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The Apple App store features a new game in which you can pretend to be a terrorist and infect the world with your own designer virus. What fun! Now, in addition to ghost weapons without serial numbers and no background checks being available legally to everyone, (plus first person shooter games being referenced by school shooters as “inspiration,”) a perfect storm is brewing for when and if the dollar collapses or someone sets off a dirty bomb in NYC. Expect gated communities to be invaded by roving bands of former neighbors now sporting AR-15s and kit-ordered flame throwers. “Are you hiding some food in there???” they will shout before blasting out all your windows and setting you on fire. Welcome to TrumpWorld. Anything goes, chaos is king. Coffee?  

infowars

“Why doesn’t he call me back?!”

MARS LANDING HOAX IN PROGRESS

Casa Grande CapsuleJUST LIKE NASA LIES ABOUT EVERYTHING THEY B LYIN BOUT DA UPCOMIN MARS MISSCION TOO. WAK UP AND SMELLS DA DARK ROAST PEOPLES!!!

tech news

You didn’t, like, answer the question. Dude. They Rule You Obey. “They” being the Youboob fake news media…InfoWars. Twitter. Facebook. Instagram. The same media Trump used to get elected. You don’t believe global warming, and this Flat Earth stuff was a great diversion, but the gig is up. Gas prices will rise again. Expect $4 a gallon at the pump by this time, next year. …Ah, the smell of petrol fumes in the mourning… Putin is pleased. He has lost enough money for his oil, but that era is over. Pollution will reign again. The Dark Side rises. The Empire goes in cycles, coming and going…kinda like the new Avatar movies upcoming. Or as they said in Battlestar Gallactica: “This has all happened before and will happen again.” We never learn.

horror movies
“Welcome to my world.”

 

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