Anthony Robbins Exchanges Fire for Tulips

Tony Robbins, with lawsuits pending, has ejected the movie FIRE WALK WITH ME from his DVD player and inserted the CD “Tiptoe Through the Tulips.” This, because people have been burned (in more ways than one) by his practice of firewalking, and science has explained that sweat on the bottom of the feet prevent embers from burning…remove the sweat and the experience is “hell.”

.

Even Oprah was deceived by this Joel Osteen school of positive thinking and the prosperity gospel. What’s the “Secret“? According to our own Ryback Solomon, “the secret is that there is no secret. There are only people wanting to sell snake oil in the form of study programs, preying on emotions. If you want to believe in the tooth fairy, go ahead, but last time we checked the only ones getting rich are the ones on his side of the microphone, not the little guys who don’t make it on Entertainment Tonight and work three jobs to pay his bills.”

.

Tiny Tim has no comment from the afterlife, although some on Ghost Hunters claim that Xenu will be taking Tim to a volcano soon in order to practice for E meter tests leading to Thetan Level 4. The Pentagon is investigating possible use of nuclear weapons by Scientology.